Dear Ate Zenie,
I'm 27 and still single. I have a male friend and we’ve been good friends for almost 6 years now. Two years ago, I worked in Taiwan and we didn’t get in touch. I came back to Manila this year and a common friend gave me his cell phone number.

He didn’t know I was already in the country so I texted him. Since then, we have constant communication through texts and emails. He’s already married but that didn’t affect our friendship. Although he wanted to us to meet, there was no chance for us to get together.

While we were texting, he brought up an old sore subject. We both liked each other before and we knew that we wanted more than friendship. But we were both too scared to act on our feelings. And, I had to move to another city to work. So there was no chance for us to go beyond friendship.

He told me he missed me. And that he wanted us to meet immediately. He was hinting that he still loved me.

Ate Zenie, I don't know what to do. I could easily fall in love with him. In fact, I think I am already in love with him. I don't want to cause problems in his marriage. Should I back out? Or should I make it clear to him that I only want us to be friends, even though I want more?

Lisa

Dear Lisa,
I think you should stop before you get into serious trouble. This man isn’t for you. He is willing to cheat on his wife. So even if you end up together, you’d never know if he’s going to cheat on you, too.

If you really don’t want to cause problems in his marriage, it should be obvious to you that you should back out. As for making it clear that you just want to be friends, that won’t be possible, especially with a man who says he’s in love with you. You know that the first chance he gets, he’s going to want to take your relationship to the next level. And with you already wanting more, where do you think that will go?

You’re too young to mess up your life by becoming a mistress. Imagine the two of you sneaking around with his suspicious wife trying to catch you together.

You had your "thing" with him. It's a part of your past you can always remember. But it didn't work out. You can’t bring the past back and continue what you had. It’s time for you to move on and find somebody else. You and this guy didn’t go beyond friendship. Take it as a sign that it wasn’t meant to be. And it will never be.

Ate Zenie